Philosophers have argued for centuries about how many angels can dance on the head of a pin, but materialists have always known it depends on whether they're jitterbugging or dancing cheek-to-cheek. Tom Robblins, novelist Success breeds arrogance and incompetence. H. Ross Perot You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you. Walter Elias Disney Perseverance is a great element of success, if you only knock long enough and loud enough at the gate, you are sure to wake up somebody. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, poet The test of a first-rate intelligence, is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function. F. Scott Fitzgerald, author The future is something which everyone reaches at the rate of 60 minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is. C.S. Lewis, author Politics is perhaps the only profession for which no preparation is thought necessary Robert Louis Stevenson, author If the human brain were so simple that we could understand it, we would be so simple that we couldn't. Emerson Pugh, technology analyst All great things are decided not by machines or gadgets, but by willpower. Whoever has it will finally prevail. Winston Churchill, British Prime Minister The man who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The man who invented the other three, he was a genius. Sid Ceasar, entertainer Organizing, is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it, it's not all mixed up. A.A. Milne, children's author I choose a block of marble, and chop off whatever I don't need. Francois-Auguste Rodin, sculptor In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice, but in practice, there is. Jan L.A. van de Snepscheut, computer scientist When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to resemble a nail. Abraham Maslow, psychologist Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech. Martin Fraquhar Tupper, author The United States is a land of free speech. Nowhere is speech freer -- not even here [in England] where we cultivate it in its most repulsive form. Winston Churchill, British Prime Minister I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.-- Will Rogers, political humorist & philosopher An optimist sees an opportunity in every calamity, a pessimist sees calamity in every opportunity. Winston Churchill, British Prime Minister Physicians can bury their mistakes, but architects can only advise their clients to plant vines, sothey should go as far as possible from home to build their first buildings. Frank Lloyd Wright, architect A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather, and ask for it back when it begins to rain. Robert Frost, poet Be not simply good, be good for something. Henry David Thoreau, philosopher When one door closes, another door opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the ones which open for us. Alexander Graham Bell, inventor One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown, is the belief that one's work is terribly important. Bertrand Russell We know too much, and are convinced of too little. T.S. Eliot, poet A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is brave five minutes longer. Ralph Waldo Emerson Every hero becomes a bore at last. Ralph Waldo Emerson The secret of business is to know something that nobody else knows. Aristotle Onassis, shipping magnate One fifth of the people are against everything all the time. Robert F. Kennedy, politician What is the use of a house if you haven't got a tolerable planet to put it on? Henry David Thoreau Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing, Benjamin Franklin, inventor, philosopher, colonial statesman Landing and moving around the moon offers so many serious problems for human beings that it may take science another 200 years to lick them. Science Digest, 1948 (21 years later, in 1969, man walked on the moon) That is the biggest fool thing we have ever done...The [atomic] bomb will never go off, and I speak as an expert in explosives, Admiral William Leahy, a U.S. Navy officer, to President Truman in 1945 Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought. John F. Kennedy, United States President You can't build a reputation on what you are going to do. Henry Ford, industrialist The marvels of modern technology include the development of a soda can which, when discarded, will last forever -- and a $7,000 car, which, when properly cared for, will rust out in two or three years, Paul Horowitz, physicist and co-author of "The Art of Electronics" The Irish are a very popular race -- with themselves. Brendan Behan, Irish playwright Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. Arthur C. Clarke, futurist and science fiction author Money can't buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy. Spike Milligan, comic Find out where your enemy is. Get at him as soon as you can. Strike at him as hard as you can, and keep moving on. Ulysses S. Grant, Civil War General I think there is a world market for maybe five computers. Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, in 1943 He that lives upon hope will die fasting Benjamin Franklin, inventor, philosopher, colonial statesman There are three kinds of people in this world: Those who make things happen; those who watch things happen; and those that wonder what happened anonymous I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won't last out the year. chief editor of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957 An expert is one who does not have to think. He knows. Frank Lloyd Wright, architect Friends come and go. Enemies accumulate. anonymous Most of us are about as eager to be changed as we were to be born, and go through our changes in a similar state of shock, James Baldwin, author of "Every Good-Bye Ain't Gone. ...the shattering stress and disorientation that we induce in individuals by subjecting them to too much change in too short a time. Alvin Toffler in "Future Shock" There is nothing more frightening than ignorance in action, Goethe Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity. George S. Patton, US Army General My father always wanted to be the corpse at every funeral, the bride at every wedding, and the baby at every christening. Teddy Roosevelt's daughter, Alice I cannot forecast to you the action of Russia. It is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. Winston Churchill, British Prime Minister When you have nothing to say, say nothing, Charles Caleb Colton, author When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty. Norm Crosby,philosopher Anyone who goes to see a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined. Samuel Goldwyn, Hollywood mogul Men stumble over the truth from time to time, but most manage to pick themselves up and run off as if nothing happened. Winston Churchill, British Prime Minister Don't throw away the old bucket until you know whether the new one holds water. Old Swedish proverb Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress--but I repeat myself. Mark Twain, author Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils, Hector Berlioz, composer I didn't need no diploma to do what I do." Louis Armstrong, legendary jazz trumpeter For the things we have to learn before we can do them, we learn by doing them, Aristotle, Greek educator and philosopher Computer, if you don't open that exit hatch pretty damn pronto, I shall go straight to your major data banks with a very large ax and give you a reprogramming you will never forget! from the 1981 film, "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" The best way to persuade people is with your ears-by listening to them. Dean Rusk, Secretary of State in the Kennedy and Johnson administrations With Congress, every time they make a joke, it's a law, and every time they make a law, it's a joke. Will Rogers, political humorist and self-styled hayseed philosopher, to an irate politician who joked at his expense on the floor of Congress Eighty percent of success is showing up. Woody Allen, director, writer, actor Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance? Charlie McCarthy (Edgar Bergen's alter ego and, decades later, Ronald Reagan) Lasciate Ogni Speranza, Voi Ch'Entrate (Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter). Inscription above the gates of Hades -- Dante, from "The Inferno"